Tales From The Jessica Files – Oral Sessions

After all, getting some oral is OK!

This is the culmination of the Elements part of our story, a series of symposiums and Q&A sessions. There is more to come, like stuff at that place with those people who do that thing. They are totally, yeah.

Published:
Publisher: Secret Freezer Publishing, LLC
Imprint: Secret Freezer Publishing, LLC
Genres:
Romance > Dystopian

Tags:
covers, elements, Punis Russi, Tales from the Jessica Files, the-jessica-files

Excerpt:

"Jessica, I won’t tell you what Jessica was written about, but I will tell you what Jessica was written about."

I looked at the front row again, and they looked shoveled and incapable of understanding what I was talking about. And I didn’t care because I didn’t care.

"I have long said that if I give you the answers to the questions, you will have them, but you will not know them.

"Folks, I can understand that some of you have had your mind blown, and some of you have not been able to reconcile this, and some of you think I’m a fucking ass douche.

"I respect all of that. But you’re here, and I haven’t seen anybody get up and leave.

"That is correct. I haven’t seen anybody leave, and this isn’t a call for people to leave and call me out because I still have some shit to say that’s possibly interesting but definitely stuff that I’m saying.

READ MORE

"Before I go through this last bit, I’ll say that I am exceptionally and incredibly, and any other adjective you want to throw down here is that people are here. There are a lot of people here."I paused and asked the moderator, for the lack of a term, "How many people, sir?"

"Sir, there were 8,479 paying attendees."

"Wow, I wasn’t aware we gave out that many free tickets."

I chuckled at that because it was silly, but it was this guy. And this guy, this guy…

I focus back on the crowd. I say, "Who wants to hear more fucked up shit?"

And I see many rows of people putting up their hands as if to indicate they wanted some more fucked up shit.

COLLAPSE
Available on
Buy Now: Amazon Kindle

Tales From The Jessica Files – Absolute Time

After all, this is love!

"Yes, Robert, what is your toast that you would have us toast to?"

Robert says, "Here’s to the eve of the day which will never come, and here is to retreat to ease the pain," and I see four glasses out."

Jessica and I join everybody in the middle with a clank.

Robert said, "Thank you, sir, because we’re not here without you; we don’t exist without you. You know this to be true, and it’s not a dead horse because everyone feels the same. We are not anything."

"Robert, I know, and I understand… I’m so thankful we’re here tonight; this is a wonderful opportunity to spend time together…"

With that, Marvalious and Arturius stand up, followed by Megaton and Robert A Smith. Two gorgeous women entered the front door and headed straight to the table.

The brothers give their wives long, loving hugs.Jessica stood before I could, not just because of my shit-ass knees but because she was friends with the wives, a war widows group if you will.

Jessica says, "Lexi, Foxy, you bitches best be giving me a hug!"

That’s what happened.

It was so special and amazing to see the family together again and everything good in the world, and I was right to come together at the right time. I walked around the table to hug Foxy first and then to Lexi.

"Ladies, it is so wonderful to see you, and I’m so glad you’re here because we needed you."

Foxy said, "Punis, you’re not laughing, so why are you so glad to see us here?"

"Well, Foxy, We’re here to karaoke, and I remember somebody telling me sometime recently that somebody was something of a karaoke machine…"

I winked, the wink of all winks.

Published:
Publisher: Secret Freezer Publishing, LLC
Imprint: Secret Freezer Publishing, LLC
Genres:
Romance > Dystopian

Tags:
covers, elements, Punis Russi, Tales from the Jessica Files, the-jessica-files

Excerpt:

"Yes, Robert, what is your toast that you would have us toast to?"

Robert says, "Here’s to the eve of the day which will never come, and here is to retreat to ease the pain," and I see four glasses out."

Jessica and I join everybody in the middle with a clank.

Robert said, "Thank you, sir, because we’re not here without you; we don’t exist without you. You know this to be true, and it’s not a dead horse because everyone feels the same. We are not anything."

"Robert, I know, and I understand… I’m so thankful we’re here tonight; this is a wonderful opportunity to spend time together…"

With that, Marvalious and Arturius stand up, followed by Megaton and Robert A Smith. Two gorgeous women entered the front door and headed straight to the table.

READ MORE

The brothers give their wives long, loving hugs.Jessica stood before I could, not just because of my shit-ass knees but because she was friends with the wives, a war widows group if you will.

Jessica says, "Lexi, Foxy, you bitches best be giving me a hug!"

That’s what happened.

It was so special and amazing to see the family together again and everything good in the world, and I was right to come together at the right time. I walked around the table to hug Foxy first and then to Lexi.

"Ladies, it is so wonderful to see you, and I’m so glad you’re here because we needed you."

Foxy said, "Punis, you’re not laughing, so why are you so glad to see us here?"

"Well, Foxy, We’re here to karaoke, and I remember somebody telling me sometime recently that somebody was something of a karaoke machine…"

I winked, the wink of all winks.

COLLAPSE
Available on
Buy Now: Amazon Kindle

Tales From The Jessica Files – Augmented Unobtainium

After all, AU is gold!

This book takes place during a timeline very close to that of The Other Side, and this is part of the suffering that Punis experienced.

Every time he interacted with Jessica, it was a scene out of The Scary Door (TJF1 reference) where another card was pulled from a deck that could not see the rest.

The idea and intent were to show the non-interlaced realities that Punis was living during the timeline of The Other Side. Things would happen in his life, like getting a new bed, and he would fantasize about seeing her again.

Don't think of these as loops, but a lineup of a deck of cards on a table, side by side. When you flip one over, you get a new reality. You flip over another card, another reality... The two cards know nothing of one another; they are independent of each other.

Published:
Publisher: Secret Freezer Publishing, LLC
Imprint: Secret Freezer Publishing, LLC
Genres:
Romance > Dystopian

Tags:
covers, elements, Tales from the Jessica Files, the-jessica-files

Excerpt:

A few moments later, I heard the footsteps again. This time, I think I’m gonna get killed. But then, I heard a voice that I felt I knew I had heard before, and I trailed off in my mind.

"Gents, what can I get y’all?"

I turned to place my order and saw… saw… her. Holy fucking shit. I dropped my Solo cup filled with water. I… I… OMG!I stood up rapidly as if there was going to be a throw-down. There wasn’t, but there was this thing and…

I just saw her. HER! Holy fucking shit!

She was standing there in front of me. I could not believe that after all this time, the pain and suffering I had endured.

So many times, I was ready to kill myself. So many times when I started to… And so many times that I continue to.

But it was her—the girl from the grocery store. I had long wondered what had happened to her, secretly hoping that somehow, somewhere, I would run into her again.

READ MORE

She looks at me, points, and says, "You!" just like she had done several times while we were flirting at the grocery store. So many years ago, so, so many years.

I stared. I just couldn’t stop staring because I could not comprehend that I was here with her, at this point in time, the one I had wanted but did not get.Our eyes were locked, and we did the dance that they normally do. I had no idea what would happen next, and not in a reality show manner. I just had no idea what would happen.

This was surreal. This was beyond imagination. This is beyond dreams or hopes and wishes and bargaining with whatever fucking Deity would listen. Spoiler alert: none of them did!

It was like being in the store so many years ago as she walked towards me, smiling—that smile that lets you know you are butter and being melted. She put her arms out and came in for a hug.

This is the point at which I think that I’d wake up because there’s no fucking way anything like this would ever happen in any universe for any reason.

This isn’t reality, but here I am, and there she is, the girl whose existence I questioned. I could see her, and she came in for a hug.

Just like the hug of all hugs on Christmas Eve Day so many years ago.

She hugged me, and it’s the kind of hug where your body is against the other’s body. No pansy-ass hug; this was a full-on hug, and I stood there in disbelief. Have I just been struck down by a deity for whom I had failed? Was I having a stroke? Was I back in purgatory, and they were fucking with me?

So many thoughts ran through my head that I could not comprehend. After an excessively long time, she pulled back away, gently grabbed my hands, and pulled them up to waist level.

She says, "I don’t know your name, but I’ve waited a lifetime to see you again."

After a protracted pause, she says, "I never thought in one million, billion, trillion years that I would ever see you again. And this is now the greatest day in my life."

I was shocked. It may be just blown away that there was this person with whom I was infatuated. The person whom I wrote many books about because they were special to me in my life at that time, and I let them walk away.

But in this reality, I didn’t kill myself and end up in purgatory. I’d have never come back. It was the light she brought and my love for her that brought me back. *see TJF 16-18

COLLAPSE
Available on
Buy Now: Amazon Kindle

Tales From The Jessica Files – Gaiety Destiny

After all, Gd is magnetic!

What is Gaiety Destiny? It's Gd or Gadolinium. Gadolinium is the 64th element in the periodic table and has a symbol of Gd and atomic number of 64. It has an atomic weight of 157.25 and a mass number of 158.

Gaiety represents the happiness and enjoyment of loving relationships. And Destiny, believing you and your partner are meant to be together."

Published:
Publisher: Secret Freezer Publishing, LLC
Imprint: Secret Freezer Publishing, LLC
Genres:
Romance > Dystopian

Tags:
elements, Punis Russi, Tales from the Jessica Files, the-jessica-files

Excerpt:

"Jessica, as I said earlier, you can fall on me. The only thing that matters is you because…while I know that you couldn't possibly have read this yet, the book after Augmented Unobtainium is going to beta, and tomorrow will be going to my proofreader, is called Gd - Gaiety Destiny.

"What does that mean?"

"Jessica, you really should stop cutting me off.

And we both chuckle and smile at each other, smiling in absolute.

"Jessica, Gaiety represents the happiness and enjoyment of loving relationships. And Destiny, believing you and your partner are meant to be together."

"Holy fucking shit! Are you fucking kidding me?"

"Larry, do you want to play rock-paper-scissors to see who goes over and bugs her?" We both laughed.

Kirk intercedes, "Gents, You know I’m not one to be bashful, so if you have no problem, I’ll go over there because I am the only man here." And the three of us fucking bust out laughing.

Kirk gets up, turns around, and walks to their table. Much to the bewilderment of Larry and me.

I turn to Larry and ask, "Dude, is this fucking happening? Is he going over to another person’s table to see if they’re Jessica?"

And Larry responds emphatically, "Holy fucking shit do you think that Jessica???""Yes, Larry, I think that, but I don’t know, and Kirk will find out."

A few moments later, Kirk sat back down and said to the table, "Incoming in 5.4.3.2.1…boom chakalaka."

And I looked up, and I saw her—her! Her! The girl from the grocery store. In an instant, I felt like a wave of emotions greater than the sum of all the atoms on the planet. It was her—it was really her.

Jessica looks at me, points, and says, "You!" It always reminded me of Hulk Hogan and his antics during the '80s and '90s, when he would "Hulk" up, no-sell, and start shaking his head, then point at his opponent and proclaim, "You!"

I stood up and stared at her because I could not believe that this was happening. No, I could not believe I could not perceive that this was happening, and I was blown away.

"Hi, my name is Jessica. Are you?"

Tales From The Jessica Files – The Thinker

After all, Th is for The Thinker!

Tales From The Jessica Files - The Thinker. After all, Th is for The Thinker. This is book 7 of Tales From The Jessica Files series.

Published:
Publisher: Secret Freezer Publishing, LLC
Imprint: Secret Freezer Publishing, LLC
Genres:
Romance > Dystopian

Tags:
covers, elements, Punis Russi, Tales from the Jessica Files

Excerpt:

As I return to the loveseat, Lexi says, "OK, we have three questions left. Let’s see. We have a $20 super chat from Hannahgram, and it reads: Punis, we used to work together, and this was the nickname you gave me. I am so surprised and blown away."

And while that may or may not be Jessica, I am the Hannahgram. I’ll send you a message. One that you’ll get. 🙂."I sat there, absolutely stunned. I know who that is, and what a lovely human, just what a lovely fucking human.

"Hannahgram, thank you for the super chat. I look forward to talking with you. It was wonderful to talk and work with you at that place. It was some of the best times of my life. It’s a shame that you were involved at that time.

"This was before Jessica, and I would’ve loved an opportunity with you. Perhaps I will. Or not?" I said. "Oh, one more thing... there could be a book called Hg - 80 in the future. You are a very smart human; you’ll get it."

READ MORE

Foxy looked up from the screen and said, "Punis, we just passed 65,000 people watching."

"Punis, there’s another $1 from Hannahgram." Lexi stopped for a second and read it: Punis, Mercury. I get it, ya. I’ll DM you shortly, and I hope we can talk. And thank you."

"Ladies, this is what I mean about getting it when you get it."I closed my eyes to pull her into myself, in my mind’s eye. I wanted to reach out into the vastness of space and find her. And I did.

"Hannahgram, I’m sure you’ll take me to school." 😉

COLLAPSE

Tales From The Jessica Files – Ag-47

After all, it's shiny.

"Folks, I said"Officer Jessica" when talking with Robert A Smith. Why do you think that is?"

One of the kids to my left states, "Because she is an officer?

"She was, she was an officer. She resigned from the force to be with me. She resigned from the force to be with Punis.

"She loved him in such an absolute that she would do that for him, having only seen and talked to him again for a few minutes when it was balls hot outside … Not much, unlike this shit right now."

Published:
Publisher: Secret Freezer Publishing, LLC
Imprint: Secret Freezer Publishing, LLC
Genres:
Romance > Dystopian

Tags:
elements, Punis Russi, Tales from the Jessica Files, the-jessica-files

Excerpt:

And they have a copy of Tales From The Jessica Files in pink. I know, right? Nobody has that? Everybody loves the white?The officer asks, "Sir, would you sign and personalize my book?"

I said, "Of course, I would; who do I make it out to? eBay?"

"Officer Jessica. And"

Everything blew up in my brain. I must've skipped, had a stroke, or not been paying attention to who the officer was and what they looked like rather than trying to be a good person.

And I looked up to the Eyes of a Stranger and said… "Jessica, what the fuck? Why would you do this to me? What the fuck? You goddamn well know I've written five books about you. I have talked about you time and again."

"Sir, I'm going to need you to step out of the car."

It was at this point I felt like I could be fucked. "OK, should I leave my iPad in the car or bring it?"

Ag 47 - It's silver and shiny.

Tales From The Jessica Files – Augmented Unobtainium

After all, AU is gold!

What is Augmented Unobtainium? It's Gold.

This book takes place during a timeline very close to that of The Other Side, and this is part of the suffering that Punis experienced.

Every time he interacted with Jessica, it was a scene out of The Scary Door (TJF1, Futurama reference) where another card was pulled from a deck that could not see the rest.

The idea and intent were to show the non-interlaced realities that Punis was living during the timeline of The Other Side. Things would happen in his life, like getting a new bed, and he would fantasize about seeing her again.

Don't think of these as loops, but a lineup of a deck of cards on a table, side by side. When you flip one over, you get a new reality. You flip over another card, another reality... The two cards know nothing of one another; they are independent of each other.

Published:
Publisher: Secret Freezer Publishing, LLC
Imprint: Secret Freezer Publishing, LLC
Genres:
Romance > Dystopian

Tags:
covers, Punis Russi, Tales from the Jessica Files, the-jessica-files

Excerpt:

Nitrogen —7

Chemical element with symbol N and atomic number 7; Electron configuration [He] 2s2 2p3 with a relative atomic mass of 14.007.

———————————————————————————

“Gents, I don’t want to alarm you, but we are about to have more company.”

Both Larry and Kirk turn around and see the members of LSE walking straight towards us.

I turn and somewhat whisper to Jessica, “I’ve got some more friends walking over, and I need to get up. I promise that you can hold me or be held by me afterward.”

READ MORE

Jessica lets go and then notices who’s coming over. She quickly turns to me and asks, “You know them too? Really?”

COLLAPSE

Augmented Unobtainium - It's gold.

Tales From The Jessica Files – The FIRST Book Of LSE

This is the story of the most regarded and influential rock band in the world, LSE (lowselfesteem), and their relationship and their importance to our most loving and wonderful couple, Punis and Jessica.

LSE holds a very, very special place in their hearts, and why wouldn't they? They knew one another, and it shows in the love they all have for one another.

We here at Secret Freezer Publishing can not underscore enough just how important the four most excellent members of the band are to us and their families.

Little did the world know just how important they would be and how the members of LSE would become a part of their own families.

Published:
Publisher: Secret Freezer Publishing, LLC
Imprint: Secret Freezer Publishing, LLC
Genres:
Romance > Dystopian

Tags:
covers, Punis Russi, Tales from the Jessica Files, the-jessica-files

Excerpt:

LowSelfEsteem was about to officially blow up. They would blow up there in Fargo, North Dakota, where Franklin Yukon, their manager, had gone to college. He had gotten a master's in business management from Eastern-Fargo Business School. See L2, It's important to note for a reason.

"Gents, we are 30 seconds out," said Robert A. Smith as he turned to his bandmates and asked everybody to huddle at the drum kit.Once there, Robert noted, "This is our time, and we've got some folks in our family to do right by tonight. All of them. All.

And with that, they turned back their attention to their spots, and when the counter hit zero and the red light came on… this was their time.

Robert stood there and waited a few seconds before stating, "We are LSE, low self-esteem. And we are going to play tonight for you on pay-per-view a combination of our first and second albums plus a sneak peek at a brand-new song that nobody has heard yet, not even our Manager…

READ MORE

"Oh, there's one more thing about tonight… Swing the cameras around, please."

And as the cameras turn, they show a completely empty stadium, just like one of their absolute favorite bands, Greenland Floyd, had done at Krakatoa some years ago.

Then the camera swung back to Robert a Smith, and he stated outright.

COLLAPSE

This is book #4 (four) of the Tales From The Jessica Files series.

Tales From The Jessica Files – From Bad to Worser – Paperback

From Bad To Worser

Before we begin on this journey, there is something that we here at Secret Freezer Publishing wish to share about the format and structure of these stories.

You see, we view “tales” as a story. The kind of story you’d tell a friend or loved one, sharing and possibly embellishing them.

Our story has no timeline; things do happen when they do happen, but this is not a straight line. You’ll just have to read all of it for the context, content, and story to come together, like a nice orange chicken sauce.

We also hope you can open your mind and read what is written, consume it for its majestic nature, and find the lost corundum… It’s out there, on the other side, waiting to be found.

Published:
Publisher: Secret Freezer Publishing, LLC
Imprint: Secret Freezer Publishing, LLC
Genres:
Romance > Dystopian

Tags:
Punis Russi, Tales from the Jessica Files, the-jessica-files

Excerpt:

“Jessica, I want to cook dinner for you one night this week. Would that sound good to you?”

“Yes, Sir, that would sound wonderful, Sir.”

“Jessica, what do you not eat so I can ensure it's not on the menu?”

“Ass, Sir.”

I bust out laughing. Holy shit, that was hysterical.

I'm sorry, Sir, butt, that's a boundary for me.”

“Yes, Ma’am. Taking ass off the menu, what else would you not want me to cook?”

"Sir, I'd like to pass on anything seafood-related at this time. Anything beef, chicken, or pork would be perfect, Sir.”

“Are there any specific vegetables that you would like? More importantly, are there any vegetables you would prefer I didn't cook for you?”

“Sir, no asparagus, Brussels sprouts, or kale. Potatoes, broccoli, green beans,… I'm a basic gal when it comes to what I eat.”

This is book #3 (three) of the Tales From The Jessica Files series.

Tales From The Jessica Files – From Bad to Worser – Hardcover

From Bad To Worser

Before we begin on this journey, there is something that we here at Secret Freezer Publishing wish to share about the format and structure of these stories.

You see, we view “tales” as a story. The kind of story you’d tell a friend or loved one, sharing and possibly embellishing them.

Our story has no timeline; things do happen when they do happen, but this is not a straight line. You’ll just have to read all of it for the context, content, and story to come together, like a nice orange chicken sauce.

We also hope you can open your mind and read what is written, consume it for its majestic nature, and find the lost corundum… It’s out there, on the other side, waiting to be found.

Published:
Publisher: Secret Freezer Publishing, LLC
Imprint: Secret Freezer Publishing, LLC
Genres:
Romance > Dystopian

Tags:
covers, Punis Russi, Tales from the Jessica Files, the-jessica-files

Excerpt:

“Jessica, I want to cook dinner for you one night this week. Would that sound good to you?”

“Yes, Sir, that would sound wonderful, Sir.”

“Jessica, what do you not eat so I can ensure it's not on the menu?”

“Ass, Sir.”

I bust out laughing. Holy shit, that was hysterical.

I'm sorry, Sir, butt, that's a boundary for me.”

“Yes, Ma’am. Taking ass off the menu, what else would you not want me to cook?”

"Sir, I'd like to pass on anything seafood-related at this time. Anything beef, chicken, or pork would be perfect, Sir.”

“Are there any specific vegetables that you would like? More importantly, are there any vegetables you would prefer I didn't cook for you?”

“Sir, no asparagus, Brussels sprouts, or kale. Potatoes, broccoli, green beans,… I'm a basic gal when it comes to what I eat.”

This is book #3 (three) of the Tales From The Jessica Files series.

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